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Isabella’s POV
“Your friends are here, honey.” Alexander’s mom said as she went to open the door to the parlor where we were sitting. “I’m gonna leave you guys now.” She said with a smile as Chloe and Ryder bowed to her in greeting.
Chloe came to sit beside me on the couch while Ryder took the armchair just beside us and opposite Alexander. It had been a week since my parents were murdered for no reason and I was still waiting for the healing that everyone says will ‘come with time‘.
I was curious, when exactly would it come? Soon? Or do I have to keep feeling this terrible pain where my heart is for a couple more years?
Although when I thought about it, it felt terrible to hope for happiness eventually when my parents were dead. The way I saw it, it would never be right for me to be happy again.
It was quiet…too quiet. I was aware of the way no one seems to know what to say to me these days but this time I’m sure it was because of the tension between Ryder and Alexander. That would never change. It was something I had come to accept. Alexander soon cleared his throat and got up,
“I just remembered that there are some things I need to attend to.” He said and I gave him all the smiles I could muster. It was amazing how thoughtful and considerate he was. I knew that Alexander always had stuff to attend to.
For the past week, he has had stuff to attend to but he chose to stick to my side like glue most of the time, and today here he was forcing himself to leave because he wanted my friends to be comfortable. As he went out, he
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walked past me but not before leaning down to press a kiss to my cheek.
After he left, I told Chloe and Ryder that I was going back to my room and that they could come with me if they wanted. It was almost stupid to say ‘if you want‘ when I knew that they would anyway. These days, it had been made clear that I couldn’t be trusted enough to stay entirely on my own and I couldn’t really blame anyone for that.
I got to my room with Chloe right beside me and Ryder hesitated at the door like he wasn’t sure if I really wanted him to come in before he finally did come in and went ahead to take a seat in the rocking plush armchair at the side.
Chloe and I sat on my bed, our backs against the headboard and our legs spread out in front of us on the bed. The room was silent until I began to hear Chloe’s quiet sniffles and when I turned to her, she was sobbing and I could see that she was trying her hardest to not completely bawl her eyes
out.
When she noticed my eyes on her, she sniffed and waved her hands, “I’m sorry, Bella. I’m supposed to be trying to make you feel better but I’m only making you more miserable. It’s just…”
Her face crumpled up again and Ryder gripped his chair as he restrained himself from coming to her, “…your parents were honestly the best people I ever met. They took me as their own child and I saw them as my parents too. They didn’t deserve this and I hate that now I’ll have to miss them because I’ll never see them again.”
bit my lip, feeling like I was actually going to be miserable due to her words. I’ll have to miss them forever. They didn’t go on a journey where I‘ ll miss them till when they eventually come back.
No, this time I’ll have to miss them forever. I hurriedly wiped off the tear that escaped my eyes before it even rolled down my cheek.
“Oh Bella, I’m so sorry,” Chloe said, coming to wrap her arms around me.
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I rested my head on her shoulder as she stroked my back while I sucked in my lips until the urge to cry seized and the tears dried up.
I didn’t know why I found it difficult to just cry. It was either I didn’t just give in to the tears no matter how severe the pain in my chest was or even when they managed to come through anyway, I stifled them quickly, barely even letting them fall.
Even when I was alone, I refused to give myself a chance to properly grieve and I couldn’t exactly say why. Even Ryder had tears in his eyes right this moment but I, their daughter, was still finding it so hard to accept their death and mourn them.
That had been the whole point of going to the morgue. Maybe it would be easier to accept it if I saw them, I thought but even after I saw their cold. pale bodies it was still hard to believe. It was hard to accept that they were gone and they were never coming back. Maybe if I ever do, I would cry and I will mourn them.
Pulling myself away from Chloe so I was holding her arms and looking straight at her, I mustered up a smile, “I haven’t even properly congratulated you about your pregnancy.”
I looked between her and Ryder and Ryder quickly wiped a tear from underneath his eyes, “I’m so happy for you both.”
“Thank you, Bella.” They both said, mustering smiles of their own. “I didn’t get to tell them.” Chloe whispered under her breath but I pretended not to hear her, grabbing her hand,
“Hey, let’s go get something to eat. I bet you guys are starving, I’ll cook.”
Chloe raised a brow, “I’m not exactly a fan of burning down houses but I guess I should just let you go ahead.”
I flicked her arm, “Hey! I’m a good cook these days, you know? Alexander likes my cooking. Blake too, in case you try to say that it’s because he’s
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my mate.”
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A couple minutes later we were downstairs in the kitchen giving all the kitchen staff a compulsory break as we made sure they all left so that we could have the kitchen all to ourselves.
Although Ryder said he wanted to help, we just pushed him to sit down, telling him that he was the critic for all the new, experimental stuff we planned to make.
“How about we bake pastries that are meant to be fried and fry the ones that are meant to be baked,” Chloe said and Ryder wrinkled his nose. We both ignored him.
“I call baking pancake mix first,” I said and Chloe grinned.
“Agreed but let’s make the pancake from scratch. The messier the better.” I smile at her.
Two hours later and we had four different weird–looking and not–so- weird–looking treats laid out on the counter while Ryder stared at them warily with a fork in his hand.
“Wait, Bella, grab the whipped cream. Let’s make it look more
presentable.” Chloe said and I giggled, going to grab the canned whipped. cream and going ahead to spray it all over the desserts.
Just then, the kitchen door opened and I was about to call out that the place was booked for the day when I saw that it was Mason and Caleb. Their blank faces immediately brightened up to fit the mood and I smiled at the effort everyone was making.
“What’s going on here?” Caleb said wrinkling his nose slightly and I was sure it was because of the cookies we may have burnt a little. Because I was fully confident in those oven pancakes.
“Food murder,” Ryder said drily and they chuckled while Chloe and I glared at him.
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“I’m gonna make pasta for everyone.” Caleb declared and everyone stared at him as he went to open a cabinet and pull out a large saucepan.
“Seriously, man?” Mason raised his brow.
“You’re gonna regret doubting me in a few,” Caleb said proudly while Chloe passed a fork to Mason and pointed at our baked pancake.
We ate the desserts while the room was filled with the surprisingly good aroma of Caleb’s pasta. I realized that we were eating dessert before food at this point but I couldn’t be bothered.
Like I predicted, the baked pancake wasn’t terrible and pessimistic Ryder had the most of it. By the time Caleb was done cooking, my forced excitement had fizzled away and I felt empty once again. He dished out all the food and we all sat down round the table for a surprisingly delicious lunch. So delicious that it hurt that I lost my appetite halfway
Minutes later of twirling my fork around my food lazily, Caleb asked if he could help me out and I happily gave it to him, not wanting to waste it.
“It was surprisingly good,” I told Caleb and he grinned.
“I’m gonna take that as a compliment.” He said as I got up from my chair.
“Where are you going?” Chloe asked me.
“I’m a bit tired. I’ll just go take a nap.” I said watching how their faces all contorted in different variations of concern.
“Are you okay?” Ryder asked, looking very concerned and I just nodded, faking a smile.
“I’m fine.” I lied and not wanting to answer any questions, I quickly gave them a small wave and disappeared into the corridor.
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