Chapter 36: Kylee
I pushed the little rake through the sand of the zen garden on the se table. It was my second therapy session of the week, but I didn’t really feel like talking. The therapist sat observing me from her chant She would ask questions. I wouldn’t reply. She would write something th
her notes.
“Come on, Kylee,” Dr. Whitham said kindly. “We finally started to make some progress last time. Why don’t we talk some more about your relationship with Theo?”
Isnorted. “What relationship?” I asked snarkily. “I was a blind idiot. Harry was right. Theo would have never looked twice at me if it wasn’t for him. But I didn’t care. After more than a year of trying to get his attention, I was so excited that he was paying attention to me.
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“It’s easy to become complicit when we want something bad enough,” Dr. Whitham replied. “Theo cared for you. You wanted to believe he reciprocated all your feelings.”
“But he didn’t,” I said bitterly. “What’s worse, I knew it. There were plenty of times I felt him pulling away. Even when things were good they…” I closed my eyes and took a deep breath. “Even when we became exclusive, I knew his heart wasn’t in it. Not the way mine was.”
“What made you think that?”
“There were several things.” I shrugged. “But I guess the biggest thing was that he still refused to see me through my heat. Luckily, I didn’t have one while we were together. But even after we announced our mating ceremony, he made it a point to tell me he wouldn’t do it until
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Chapter 36: Kylen
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we were marked.”
“And how did you respond to that?” my therapist asked.
“Not well,” I snapped. “Look, I’m not here to figure out everything I did wrong. I’m well aware of the shit show I created.”
“Then why are you here?” she asked,
“I need to know how to reconcile it all,” I whispered. “I’m so ashamed and embarrassed. I know now how horrible I have been and how much I hurt people. But I’m also still hurt and angry.”
“You still blame your sister?”
“No,” I replied, then paused. “Yes. Yes, my heart wants to blame her, but my head knows I have no right to. That bothers me more than anything. I should be angry at myself, but I’m not. At least, not when I think about Theo. When I think about how everything turned out, I get mad, and I blame Ayla. That anger is directed at her. That’s wrong.”
“You say that, but you also refuse to talk to me about your sister,” Dr. Whitham stated. “It’s hard for me to help advise you when I don’t have all the information.”
I sighed heavily, looking at the clock.
“I think we’ll have to save that for the next session, Doctor,” I said. “We don’t have nearly enough time left to get into that.”
“I will hold you to that, Kylee,” she replied. “Are you still journalling like we talked about?”
“Yep,” I nodded as I stood from my chair to leave.
I had been, but I wasn’t sure how much help it had been. Mostly, it was
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Chapter 36 Rylee
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reliving the last few years of my life. Then, reading what I wrote, only to realize the horror of my behavior. It didn’t help that I was still finding out the reality of my childhood. Ma was in the part of the program where she was learning to admit her wrongdoings and take stock of them all. Since I promised her and Ayla that I would be there for her through this, a lot of information was coming out about the last ten years since Daddy’s death.
I hoisted my bag higher on my shoulder as I stood at the bus station. I could just see my breath in the cool fall air. I wasn’t cold yet. Werewolves had a higher body temperature, so we didn’t feel the cold the same way as humans. But I was reminded that living this far north would mean I had to get a winter coat at some point.
Alpha Harden had been good to us since we came to his territory. Ma and I were given a new last name and identities to help keep us hidden from the Waar Pak. Alpha Harden or his brother, Alpha Cooper, would update us if they felt we needed to know anything. They had Ma in a top–notch rehab facility and provided me with a nice little two- bedroom apartment for when she was released.
I got off the bus on the other side of town and headed toward the alley. It was Thursday evening, so the smell from the dumpsters was strong and unpleasant, but they would be there in the morning to empty them. I yanked the heavy back door open and went to the small break room. I pulled my apron and uniform top from my bag and quickly put them on, tucking my bag into one of the beat–up old lockers.
“Finally,” a gruff voice huffed behind me. “You’re late. Hurry up and get your ass on the floor. Table seven needs to be greeted.”
The owner stomped away without waiting for a response. I resisted the urge to roll my eyes. I wasn’t late. I was actually twenty minutes early. But it didn’t matter to him.
I had been working at this hole–in–the–wall diner for three weeks now.
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The owner was a bit of an ass, but his shift manager, Carrie, was rather pleasant In all fairness, she was the one that kept this place in business. The regulars came for her open and kind nature. I liked her instantly and didn’t think I would have made it through the first two days without her. It took me two weeks to admit that she reminded me of Ayla
“Kylee, love,” Carrie said as I emerged from the kitchen behind the long bar counter, “I know you’re early, but would you mind grabbing table seven, please?”
“I got it,” I replied with a smile.
The majority of our clientele were regulars that I was already becoming familiar with, so it was a change of pace when I approached the corner table and found a fresh face.
“Welcome to Paul’s Diner.” I greeted with a forced smile. “What can get for you today?”
The man’s attention landed on me. He looked me up and down, lingering on my name tag as a smile spread across his face.
“Kylee, right?” he asked.
I nodded, suppressing a sarcastic response.
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“I’m Derek,” he stated. “It’s lovely to meet you. I’m open to suggestions. I’m afraid this is my first time here.” His gaze held mine for a moment. “However, I’m guessing I’ll soon become a regular customer.”
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Chapter 37 Brigge
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